It’s funny isn’t it that we spend most of our time wanting other people’s opinions, input, validation or help with making decisions yet really over everything the decision should always come from your soul. This is why this week I wanted to talk to you about why you should stop listening to other people.
The test here is whether you trust yourself, your intuition and your path. Even I question my intuition sometimes and want my loved ones advice. We’re also taught that it’s healthy to share our concerns, talk to people and ask for help. This is absolutely true and so important so that we can feel held and heard in our moments of crisis. I decided this topic needed to be discussed after I posted the question in my Facebook group ‘What would you tell your younger self? So many of you responded that you would tell your younger self to not care what others think or listen and it made me realise we all need to do this. I’ve been doing this for years after having little or no support in my couponing business and vision I realised I had to be that person who gave myself validation and encouragement. Even with this business and the book pretty much every achievement in my life over the last few years someone’s had an opinion on it. That it was crazy, unrealistic, I was too young and that I shouldn’t do it. Now luckily I’ve got to a place where career wise I trust my intuition and myself hard, I very rarely ask for input or ‘permission’ as it feels like sometimes.
Yet in my personal life, I was the complete opposite I would naturally go to my loved ones for advice, a shoulder to cry on or support and what I ended up being faced with was a lot of negativity, unsolicited advice and opinions that just weren’t helpful. The worst bit is as much as I stood up for myself and a lot of the time I just didn’t say anything. It was becoming increasingly harder to keep positive and believe in myself and heart when I had this dark cloud of negativity over me influencing my vibes. Now I know my loved ones care for me deeply and want my happiness more than anything but there comes a line and it was being crossed numerous times. I even found myself thinking ‘I would never dream of saying that to someone!’
It can be hard to keep that belief and trust when it feels like the whole world is against you and it was one of my friend’s who actually said to me ‘People will always find a problem with something you just need to not listen and trust in your vibes’. This is when I had the lightbulb moment – even when I was happy in life they would still find a reason to complain about it or say something was wrong when truthfully nothing was wrong there never was. I had made myself believe there was something wrong with me because of the negativity and pressure that can come from loved ones. I couldn’t believe that I had fallen into this spiral of illusion and let an external opinions affect me so badly. The final straw came when I was told ‘You listen to your intuition in your business all the time but clearly, you don’t listen to it in your personal life’. I had to laugh at this because of course I bloomin’ do, I live and breathe my intuition and I certainly wouldn’t be the strong person I am today fighting for what I believe in against all odds if I didn’t feel in the depths of my soul it was for me.
I’m always lead by my intuition 100% of the time if it’s not a hell YASSS it’s a hell no for me! What I’ve come to learn since being a life coach and even in my own spiritual journey is no one knows you like you know yourself. People can offer advice, opinions or judgements and you don’t have to take any of it on board if it doesn’t resonate with you – even absolute strangers online email me their opinions on my life from watching one YouTube video of mine do I listen? HELL NO! I myself needed to use the same fuck it attitude I’ve had with my businesses in my personal life too. This is your life Queen, your unique life path and YOU know what is best. Trust yourself and your inner compass because it will never lead you astray. If you don’t have others support on this then get ready to do it anyway and prove them wrong. I also saw a quote recently which also changed my perspective ‘Stop worrying about it not working out because it really all could work out’.
A Course In Miracles teaches us that only love is real, anything that isn’t love is an illusion. I reminded myself of these teachings and saw myself almost in this bubble of negativity and I wasn’t even sure how I’d got into it. I knew from that point moving forward I would keep my decisions to myself until I was happy and not let anyone’s energy or opinions affect my happiness. As soon as I made this decision an old friend was sent back into my life and kindly forced me to talk about this to her, she didn’t know anything and I could just be my happy positive self about it and I can’t describe you to what a wave of relief washed over me. The bubble was burst and the illusion had been removed – I felt the good vibes within myself again, I felt happy and carefree and I saw the truth of the situation again that everything really was okay. It actually helped me to manifest so much easier as I was in the vibration of happiness and trust once again. Fear and negativity from others had lead me to believe that it felt impossible and there was a problem when literally there wasn’t! I know the Universe sent this friend to remind me of love and that I could believe in myself and intuition outside of my work too. Since that point I haven’t looked back, the illusion of fear has been removed and I said fuck it! I’m going to believe my intuition and not fear anymore because what if it did all go well?
“Follow those gut feelings, is it a hell YASSS or a hell no?”
So my message to you here is if you feel like it’s you against the world with something, there are genuine people rooting for you still including me. Don’t discuss your plans or intentions with anyone who will plant doubt of fear in your mind. Keep that energy protected and positive, allow yourself to remove the illusion of fear and see the truth of the matter – is it actually all okay? Remember that only love is real and that love extends to yourself here, over anything this your journey that only you can decide. Follow those gut feelings, is it a hell YASSS or a hell no? Most importantly release the need to please people, they will always find a problem somewhere in your life even when things are great so you might as well do it anyway and live your life for you! If people are judging or trying to project negativity or jealousy onto you through ‘advice’ then that is within them Queen, not you – but use it as an excuse to reclaim your power and take control back in your life. I think back to all the times in my life I haven’t listened to people and it’s been the best decision of my life, if I had of listened to them I certainly wouldn’t be where I am today, thriving or happy within myself!
I hope this blog post has helped you to see why you should stop listening to other people and stay in your own lane. While asking for advice, talking and asking for help is still great and sometimes the push we need to action things you need to be in alignment with what is being advised. If your not, then write it off and trust yourself and the Universe over anything. As always please do let me know your thoughts in the comments box below. I’m also super chuffed to be nominated for an award in the Kindred Spirit 2019 Awards in the ‘MBS Blogger/Podcaster’ category. If my work has inspired or helped you in any way please could you vote for me here, it only takes a few seconds and would mean the world to me! I hope you all have a fantastic week whatever you are up to and I’m sending you all lots of love xx